“Gina, please. There’s nothing in there for you. Let me take care of it. I’ll grab whatever you need.”
I remembered the tension that entered his voice whenever I mentioned that room.
I told myself it was protectiveness.
That was what love looked like, I believed.
That was what devotion sounded like.
My best friend, Marissa, was not convinced.
“You’ve been shrinking, Gina,” Marissa said one afternoon as she sat across from me at the kitchen table. “You used to argue with me about everything. Now you wait for Brian to decide.”
“I know he has. But have you looked into that clinical trial I sent you?”
“Brian says it’s a long shot. He doesn’t want me to get my hopes up.”
My friend went quiet.
“And what do you want?”
I had no answer.
At some point, I had stopped asking myself that question.
For years, specialists had told me there was nothing they could do.
Then, a month earlier, Marissa told me about an experimental laser procedure available through a clinical program. The doctors warned that success was not guaranteed, and Brian insisted I was setting myself up for disappointment.
Still, I brought it up over dinner.
Brian placed his fork on the table. “Sweetheart, we talked about this.”
“I know. I just thought…”
“You’ll break your own heart,” he said, and I heard that familiar tightness in his voice again. “I don’t want to watch you fall apart when it doesn’t work.”
I released a slow breath.
“I’ve thought about it a lot,” I said. “Marissa’s willing to help me through the recovery either way.”
“Marissa,” my husband repeated flatly. “Of course.”
He did not refuse again.
Instead, he changed the subject to the leftovers, and I allowed him to because arguing with Brian had never come naturally to me.
A few days later, he left on another week-long business trip.
He kissed my forehead and promised to call every night.
The house became silent around me.